I am writing this today as it was cripping me for a very long time....
I happened to watch Neeyanaana and the topic was why girls prefer nuclear family nowadays (going to be married girls) and girls put down their views differently. when it came to the mother's side the first thing a mother said was " we feel bad when a girl takes her husband with her after bringing him up for so many years" and other mother said " why cant you people think us also as your mother"
so here comes my arguement. for the first mother I pose a question : when you have so much insecurity that your son ll be taken by your DIL then why the hell do you get your son married ????? why do you want to spoil your son's life and the girl's life????? is it just because you will be questioned by your society that if your son remains a bachelor????or is it just because your son should sleep with a girl and give her a child and prestige to your life??? or is it just for a prestige issue that you get your son married and torture the girl for life long??? for you mothers I tell you... nowadays girls and guys are smarter than what you think... they want harmony in whatever they doa nd wherever they are...
to the second mom I ask you a question... we think you as a second mother but it is you who fail to think us as a daughter... why do you compare us with your daughter or with your relatives ? why do you suppress us in front of your relatives or why do you want to show the MIL domination????? you have crossed our age and you too had been a DIL and you have become a MIL now... you would also have experienced the same in your young days.... your husband would have been more rigid than compared to the guys of this age. when you ahve experienced so much you must be in a mentality that atleast you should make your son and DIL happy after all they are going to live after your age !
As the tamil saying goes " Thhayiku pin Thaaram" your son will love you first and then only his wife.... then why the HELL Do you always want to show your love and possessiveness when a girl comes to your house???? better let her be happy in her mom's house and even the girl parents will be happier.... except that their girl is unmarried.....
I would like to tell here... My MIL's MIL passed away nearly 15 to 20 years back.. but even now my MIL regrets for having been in a joint family ( with FIL, MIL and Sister in laws and cooking for them )!!!! now she is 62 and she still says that her MIL didnt have the BRAINS to make her(my MIL and FIL) and husband to live alone!!! and when she argues with me she indirectly says that she served her MIL till her last breath.... what is the point in doing that when you have so much hatred in yourMIL still !!!!!????? Is it just to pinpoint me that I am stayingwith my husband and kid alone and you are alone with your husband???? Did I ask you to do so???
My request to all the mothers in this world esp in India..... YOUR SON WILL NEVER EVER LEAVE YOU ALONE IN THIS WORLD NO MATTER HOW WORSE HIS LIFE MAY BE WITH HIS WIFE!!!! believe me!!! you can ask me a question here that how many sons are so like this today??? if thats the case then why the topic is still being talked about???? a relative of mine got her daughter married and the daughter's life changed so badly after her marriage !!!! her MIL used to sleep or stay in the bedroom until her son sleeps and then leave the bedroom.... then how would the girl feel??? I am asking a question to the mothers... what is the thing that you do in a private room which is meant only for your son and DIL???? wont you feel disgusting to enter in to the private room of a couple????
try to understand that we girls are making so much effort to make you believe that we have come from a decent family and we will never take your son from you because we too have brothers and mothers.... It is in your hands to believe your DIL's that they are wonderful second daughters and they are here in your family to retain and bring harmony to the family....
When you insist that only your family customs should be followed that is when a girl of this generation or any generation for that matter gets annoyed including you!!!! she knows that this is her home and slowly she will adapt and adopt the family traditions and values.... never ever force your DIL that how she should behave ... you will be hated to the core by her!!!! understand that she too has feelings and she too misses her parents more than what you think!!! that is why you are asked to consider her as a daughter and treat her like you treat your daughter! even if you cant treat her like a daughter never treat her like a slave! do not try to show your smartness in front of your relatives! you will be screwed later!!!!
Try to get the mindset that she is the one who has to take care of your son after your age... you cant live for 100 years when thats the case you should make your mind that she is everything for him hereafter.... if you make your DIL happy eventually your son will love you more than what you think!!!! you are responsible for your son's happiness!!!!
we always love you after all you are a mother love us also the same way like you love your daughter! PLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASE.........
I happened to watch Neeyanaana and the topic was why girls prefer nuclear family nowadays (going to be married girls) and girls put down their views differently. when it came to the mother's side the first thing a mother said was " we feel bad when a girl takes her husband with her after bringing him up for so many years" and other mother said " why cant you people think us also as your mother"
so here comes my arguement. for the first mother I pose a question : when you have so much insecurity that your son ll be taken by your DIL then why the hell do you get your son married ????? why do you want to spoil your son's life and the girl's life????? is it just because you will be questioned by your society that if your son remains a bachelor????or is it just because your son should sleep with a girl and give her a child and prestige to your life??? or is it just for a prestige issue that you get your son married and torture the girl for life long??? for you mothers I tell you... nowadays girls and guys are smarter than what you think... they want harmony in whatever they doa nd wherever they are...
to the second mom I ask you a question... we think you as a second mother but it is you who fail to think us as a daughter... why do you compare us with your daughter or with your relatives ? why do you suppress us in front of your relatives or why do you want to show the MIL domination????? you have crossed our age and you too had been a DIL and you have become a MIL now... you would also have experienced the same in your young days.... your husband would have been more rigid than compared to the guys of this age. when you ahve experienced so much you must be in a mentality that atleast you should make your son and DIL happy after all they are going to live after your age !
As the tamil saying goes " Thhayiku pin Thaaram" your son will love you first and then only his wife.... then why the HELL Do you always want to show your love and possessiveness when a girl comes to your house???? better let her be happy in her mom's house and even the girl parents will be happier.... except that their girl is unmarried.....
I would like to tell here... My MIL's MIL passed away nearly 15 to 20 years back.. but even now my MIL regrets for having been in a joint family ( with FIL, MIL and Sister in laws and cooking for them )!!!! now she is 62 and she still says that her MIL didnt have the BRAINS to make her(my MIL and FIL) and husband to live alone!!! and when she argues with me she indirectly says that she served her MIL till her last breath.... what is the point in doing that when you have so much hatred in yourMIL still !!!!!????? Is it just to pinpoint me that I am stayingwith my husband and kid alone and you are alone with your husband???? Did I ask you to do so???
My request to all the mothers in this world esp in India..... YOUR SON WILL NEVER EVER LEAVE YOU ALONE IN THIS WORLD NO MATTER HOW WORSE HIS LIFE MAY BE WITH HIS WIFE!!!! believe me!!! you can ask me a question here that how many sons are so like this today??? if thats the case then why the topic is still being talked about???? a relative of mine got her daughter married and the daughter's life changed so badly after her marriage !!!! her MIL used to sleep or stay in the bedroom until her son sleeps and then leave the bedroom.... then how would the girl feel??? I am asking a question to the mothers... what is the thing that you do in a private room which is meant only for your son and DIL???? wont you feel disgusting to enter in to the private room of a couple????
try to understand that we girls are making so much effort to make you believe that we have come from a decent family and we will never take your son from you because we too have brothers and mothers.... It is in your hands to believe your DIL's that they are wonderful second daughters and they are here in your family to retain and bring harmony to the family....
When you insist that only your family customs should be followed that is when a girl of this generation or any generation for that matter gets annoyed including you!!!! she knows that this is her home and slowly she will adapt and adopt the family traditions and values.... never ever force your DIL that how she should behave ... you will be hated to the core by her!!!! understand that she too has feelings and she too misses her parents more than what you think!!! that is why you are asked to consider her as a daughter and treat her like you treat your daughter! even if you cant treat her like a daughter never treat her like a slave! do not try to show your smartness in front of your relatives! you will be screwed later!!!!
Try to get the mindset that she is the one who has to take care of your son after your age... you cant live for 100 years when thats the case you should make your mind that she is everything for him hereafter.... if you make your DIL happy eventually your son will love you more than what you think!!!! you are responsible for your son's happiness!!!!
we always love you after all you are a mother love us also the same way like you love your daughter! PLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASE.........
